one of our very best friends graduated from UBC today with his Masters. it was a very moving time for me. not because of what his master’s was in (religious studies and history and other stuff that makes my brain hurt). but because of the journey we have traveled with him.
you see, he and his wife Dar, are some of our best friends. they have been for a number of years. it was with them that the dream of what community in an urban city could possibly look like came to be…mission burnaby.
we lived under the same roof for 3 years in burnaby. they were in the basement suite and we were upstairs. there was a door between that sectioned off the two…but that door was open lots. our families grew together, yet separately. we watched hayley go from a barely walking 1 yr old to a 4 year old doing a fantastic job being big sister to brandon, her 18 month old little bro. we shared morning coffee together frequently. we watched late movies together when all our kids were in bed a time or two. we planned curry meals for weekends and special occasions. we even went on adventures together on the skytrain. :)
it’s hard to articulate just what scott & darlene mean to us. in many ways we are so opposite as couples. i’m talking SO opposite. :) giggle. i would plan dinner, if i was cooking, at 4pm that night…dar would have already planned out her meals for the week. we liked family vacations that involved enclosed structures to sleep and running water…they like camping in tents.:) dar was disciplined in training and running…me…not so much. :) you get the picture..
but maybe that’s what made “us” work…the fact that we were different enough that we were interesting to each other and could learn so much from each other. the fact that jonathan and scott were dubbed “girlfriends” before we moved out to vancouver together, because of the countless hours they would spend on the phone and talk about “the dream” of what could be. the fact that both dar and i, both having very different experiences together with girl friends, became just that: girl friends.
so when i was driving to meet up with them and jonathan at the chan centre down at UBC this morning and then to go to Sophies for our “celebration breakfast” afterwards, the tears began to roll. not because i forgot my memory card and iPhone and had to go back to get them.. :) … no because a season with them was coming to a bittersweet end.
i say bittersweet for several reasons…bitter cuz i hate saying goodbye. i hate change. and i hate grieving. sweet because they are beginning an exciting chapter of scott starting his PhD. of another baby joining them in the fall. and them buying their first house. bitter because they are moving out of vancouver before us. they are moving to waterloo. and we wont be there for the birth of their 3rd baby. sweet because dar will be able to take her maternity leave just when they move there and enjoy their first year in their new place. scott will be on the last journey of his education leg. and they are our friends and we believe in them.
but still…my heart grieves. grieves for the loss that will be so evident once they leave. grieves not being able to “drop by” and say hi and sip coffee when we want. grieves that we aren’t going to be journey in the same city, let alone continent together in the next season of life.
i have grown much these last three years in burnaby.. this i know. but i also know that i have become a better person in the last 3 years because of my friends scott and dar.
so…today i celebrate with you both in scott’s HUGE milestone today.
thank for you taking a chance on being friends with us way back in 2004.
thanks for moving out west with us to chase this “dream” with us.
and thanks for being some of our best friends. some of our forever friends. near or far, “we” will always be.